Posts tagged “boobs

TRAILER: PLAYING WITH DOLLS: HAVOC (2017)

Havoc_poster

Havoc_poster

PLAY WITH DOLLS: HAVOC is the third film in this slasher series, developed by director Rene Perez (THE DEAD AND THE DAMNED) and the production house of Von Metz Entertainment. The third film find’s (more…)


BLU-RAY REVIEW: THE LOST FILMS OF HERSCHELL GORDON LEWIS (2013)

HGL1

Herschell Gordon Lewis is a legendary director, one that I have met and chatted with on more than one occasion, and could not be a nicer man around. Then one remembers that he has directed countless cult films such as BLOOD FEAST, TWO THOUSAND MANIACS!, COLOR ME BLOOD RED, and THE WIZARD OF GORE—And those are just (more…)


BLU-RAY/DVD COMBO REVIEW: COUNTESS DRACULA (1971)

countess dracula

The story taking place in medieval Europe about Countess Elisabeth Nadasdy, better known to horror fans and the rest of the world as Countess Bathory, focuses on the aging Countess and her lover Captain Dobi (played by character actor Nigel Green) as they start killing off young and beautiful virgins so she can bathe in their blood. The old and decrepit looking Countess, played by the vivacious and voluptuous Ingrid Pitt with lots of (more…)


SHU-IZMZ RADIO: Beauty and the Beasts of HORROR!

shuizmz-talkradio595x595

Another episode of SHU-IZMZ RADIO at CORE OF DESTRUCTION RADIO is upon the readers of SHU-IZMZ! I have been working really hard at getting unique and driven individuals in the indie horror scene to spill their GUTS on my show. This week I was able to talk again with actor, writer, and producer (more…)


REVIEW: THE CEMETERY (2013)

cemetery

cemeteryDirector Adam Ahlbrandt graciously granted SHU-IZMZ RADIO listeners an interview on the show (click here to download and listen) to talk about his indie horror slasher film, CROSS BEARER, starring Natalie Jean, Isaac Williams, and Shaun Paul Costello, and immediately following that interview he offered a digital screener of THE CEMETERY since as of this writing it has not been released in the United States. However, those in Germany are going to be able to pick up the film over there.

I enjoyed CROSS BEARER a good deal, as it offered a well-balanced amount of gore, boobs, and blood—but I enjoyed THE CEMETERY even more! Adam definitely increased the amount of (more…)


DVD REVIEW: DEAR GOD NO! (2012)

dear god no

dear god noJames Bickert’s DEAR GOD NO! is a throwback to the drive-in and grindhouse fare that presently is having a resurgence of sorts with many filmmakers making throwback films that were usually in 2-run movie theaters and venues, as well as usually released on VHS and found in small “mom and pop” movie rental shops and of substandard quality. These films were the ones that I usually sought out as a young man because they generally had quite a bit of gore, blood, boobs, and bush. Remember, the three ‘B’s are essential when watching these types of movies and are crucial to my overall (more…)


NIGHT SCARES comes to LOGAN SQUARE THEATRE!

manson family

For fans of the macabre, the gory, and the sleazy–a new midnight film series showcasing some of the most notoriously sleazy, bloody, vile, gory pieces of trashy grindhouse cinema never meant for mass consumption a monthly film series event is coming to the Logan Theatre at midnight. After all, the people that attend these (more…)


PRESS RELEASE: DIABOLIQUE Magazine’s Latest Issue feat. SOSKA TWINS

The following is a press release from Horror Unlimited and their magazine DIABOLIQUE. This horror mag looks pretty interesting and although I have not read an issue yet, it looks like it has some quality articles within its pages. I have browsed through an issue here and there when visiting one of my favorite magazine stops, CITY NEWSSTAND in the Portage Park neighborhood in Chicago. I thought I would share this press release for the latest issue of the magazine for SHU-IZMZ readers that are not familiar with the magazine. I am always happy to hear of magazines that are still in print and being published in a day and age when so many magazine companies are out of business or only in a digital format. Maybe DIABOLIQUE will send ol’ SHU a complimentary issue of their magazine for further inspection and review??? (more…)


SHU-IZMZ RADIO: Interview with Author ROBERT ROSEN

shuizmz-talkradio595x595

Following  the review of BEAVER STREET: A HISTORY OF MODERN PORNOGRAPHY, I felt compelled to have a chat with the author, Robert Rosen, about his 16 dirty, dirty years working as a writer, editor, and…well…pornographer in the porn magazine industry. Readers of SHU-IZMZ know what affinity we have here for boobs, blood, and bush—while there isn’t really any blood in the porn-tastic memoir (not of the stabbing or slashing variety, anyhow!), all topics and subjects covered were extremely relevant for all parties interested.

Here is the download link for the interview, but I must warn you (more…)


SHU-IZMZ RADIO: Interviewing NATALIE SLATER of BAKE & DESTROY!

shuizmz-talkradio595x595

Here is the download link for a very gnarly interview with the beautifully raunchy, yet eloquent, Natalie Slater of http://www.bakeanddestroy.net! The interview gets extremely personal and explicit. I rarely interview hot, tattooed women on my show and it’s even RARER that they also dig wrestling, talking about bush, love Black Metal, and read alot (or even at all!). She is a friend of mine and runs the coolest baking website on the fucking planet! I found out something about her that I never knew, as well as learned about (more…)


INTERVIEW: DONALD F. GLUT talks Horror, Sci-Fi, and Superheroes!

DON GLUT

Maybe you have heard of director, writer, and producer Donald F. Glut. After all, he wrote the movie novelization for THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK. But before Don was writing Sci-fi movie novelizations Don was busy making amateur horror and science-fiction films (at the age of 9) featuring monsters, human monsters, and dinosaurs! Hell, why am I even wasting time telling you all about (more…)


REVIEW: ILSA: SHE WOLF OF THE SS (1975)(Chopped Version)

Screen shot 2012-03-10 at 3.22.57 PM

This review was brought to you by the sponsorship of the folks over at ZOMBIEBLOODFIGHTS.COM.

One of my major pet peeves is the releasing of a film that is notorious for nudity, sex, violence, and gore—and releasing it cut and chopped to pieces, removing the nastiest of the aforementioned characteristics that gave the particular film its notoriety. Today, the Koreans have royally pissed me off in releasing an 87 min. version of ILSA: SHE WOLF OF THE SS, the Korean Import version, where 9 minutes has been removed from the film. Generally, all scenes showing below the waist frontal nudity has been completely cut out. If anyone has read my posts they will realize that I am a fan and connoisseur of women who choose to leave their pelvic regions unshaven. I am a fan of “the bush”. If I were to choose an era of porn films to watch, the ’70s would be my predilection. (more…)


REVIEW: BLOOD SCARAB (2008)

Blood ScarabYet even more B-Movie Madness….

Donald F. Glut’s final vampire flick in the Dracula/Vampire Trilogy, BLOOD SCARAB (2008), seems to be the best plot-wise and possesses some finer acting than his other two Dracula films. The lovely Monique Parent plays the role of Countess Elizabeth Bathory, the infamous lesbian vampire, who was notorious for bathing in the blood of her virgin victims…oh wait—that is not true. The storyline for BLOOD SCARAB would like to have us believe this. In truth, (more…)


REVIEW: DINOSAUR VALLEY GIRLS (1996)

Dinosaur Valley GirlsIt’s B-Movie Madness time!

I first saw a Donald F. Glut film way back when I was reviewing movies for another website. It was one of the films sent to me and I think I only received it because no one else wanted to review it. Part of the reason may have been because it takes a certain type of person in a certain type of mood to enjoy and appreciate B-movies. Also, some are pretty awful and not very entertaining. Let’s find out where director Glut’s films fared that I had the chance to check out. (more…)


REVIEW: KILLER YACHT PARTY (2006)

killer_yacht_party_large


Troma Films, known for their low-brow toilet humor blended in with low-budget indie schlock “classics” such as THE TOXICAVENGER, CLASS OF NUKE ‘EM HIGH SURF NAZIS MUST DIE, as well as distributing some solid cult-like entries in the sleaze market such as Joel M. Reed’s BLOODSUCKING FREAKS, we now have some modern-day films from Troma. As a young teenager, the company Troma meant T&A and gore, mixed with crude humor and I guess as a young prepubescent boy-I was ok with that. Now, grown up a little more (and I stress “little”), I need a bit more than flashes of boobies, some fart/toilet humor, and uber-cheesy gore and blood.

With KILLER YACHT PARTY, the feature debut of Piotr Uzarowicz, I believe Troma Films is still putting out some films that are more in line with the word “horrible” than “horrorfying”. In fact, I actually was a bit surprised that KILLER YACHT PARTY was not as bad as I thought it would be. The plot of the film revolves around a core group of douchebags that are only into the club scene and what it entails-getting drunk and getting laid. I used to work at a nightclub and it seemed that everyone associated with it just wanted to party every night, score with the hot ladies (or guys, depending on one’s preference), and either sell drugs at the venue or for promoters-make tons of money at the door and on liquor sales. This film throws in the mix a club on a yacht that has a haunted history, and a murderer racking up a body count.

One of the more interesting scenes in the film

The film is, essentially, a slasher film on a yacht. Oh yeah, and it advertises Kate Luyben is in it from TRUE BLOOD. Luyben was in two episodes of TRUE BLOOD in 2010, but I guess because she really was not in many other television or horror movies, this is the route to go in the ad campaign to get folks to want to check it out. Granted, this film is listed in IMDb as having been made in 2006, and then picked up by Troma about five years later (and 4 years after Lubyen was in TRUE BLOOD), this is really the only drawing aspect to me wanting to see this film, aside from the promise of “busty, hot girls” getting “butchered. Well, on this point, the film sort of delivers.

There are some very hot girls in this film—ya know, the plastic, fake kind that have had plastic surgery to get perfect noses, cheek bones, and tits. Also, most of these ladies look as though they wouldn’t know how to cook a microwave dinner, but then these are the girls that most viewers enjoy seeing slashed and gutted. I know I love when the spoiled, hot, rich girl gets it by the ugly, maniacal killing psychopath!

Becky Boxer and Maggie Marion

So, the club promoters, Brock (Eric Clark) and Monica (Kate Luyben) have set up this yacht party and Lacy (Becky Boxer) and Jane (Maggie Marion) who were at an event the club promoters were throwing the night (or week) before, get an exclusive invitation to attend this yacht party. Of course, the film tries to throw in some mysterious and odd characters to throw the audience off into not really figuring out for sure who the killer was, but after watching the film, it becomes fairly obvious who, or what, has been killing off everyone on the boat (oops, plot spoiler). Yeah, the film has quite a bit of murders and killing throughout most of the film. This would be a good thing, except that the murders are pretty straight-forward and really lack the creativity in how the victims are picked off one by one, which I think is an important aspect in truly making a solid slasher film. In all of the Friday the 13th films, Jason, or his mother, or a revenge-driven paramedic-they all have very fun and creative ways that the killer takes out his victims. It is one of the only reasons that I watch and enjoy slasher films, aside from the usual large amounts of gratuitous nudity from very attractive “actresses” (some of which are only cast for their screaming ability and luscious bodies), but it is, nonetheless, a valid reason.

KILLER YACHT PARTY lacks any type of imagination in the kill-scene department. Sometimes it is hard to think of new ways to kill a human being aboard a boat. There are only so many ways one can die, especially on a boat and there have been boatloads (pun intended!) of movies that have had victims dispatched on a boat. Therefore, why not at least have the full murder scene shown instead of dicing it up with annoying edits, spots of black screen breaking up the full murder. I guess that is the only way I know how to describe the edits when murder scenes occur. There are cuts in the middle of the murders where black nothing appears, almost as if the scenes were being cut and censored by the MPAA, but that is not the case because the film does not even have a rating on it.

The scenes of blood and little gore could have been done a bit better and would have looked better if there weren’t annoying editing spots tossed in during most of the murders. The scenes that were not shown, such as a girl lying on the floor with shards of a broken mirror stuck in her face and the rest of her body in random placement, were just after-shots of murders and usually were sub-par in the special effects department.

The gore and blood within this film is not up to par, but the acting in the film was not quite as bad as I thought it would be. Granted, many of the names in the film have been in small roles here and there or uncredited in some of the films they were in, but I felt that the D-List actors and actresses in the film did have some acting ability and gave the film a status that was a notch or two above an uber-low budgeted film that not only had extremely low production values, but also talentless bodies running through the scenes without any grace or purpose.

The plot directs viewers into the mystique of a woman that died on the boat and is believed to be haunting it, as well as having a creepy old guy taking care of the boat and also its captain. Then we have another old creepy guy, sort of like the old man’s character in the first few FRIDAY THE 13TH movies, warning the horny, playful teenagers and camp counselors that Crystal Lake was doomed and everyone that sets foot on the grounds will die. This old creepy guy in KILLER YACHT PARTY hangs around the docks and just acts creepy, as well as giving a lift to an unwanted drug dealer that was banned from attending the party, as well as the club promoters’ events. The film tries to confuse viewers into thinking one or several other characters or a ghost is doing the killing.

Is KILLER YACHT PARTY a ‘whodunnit murder mystery’ or just a less than good example of a slasher film? I would tend to lean towards the latter as the murders throughout the entire film don’t really conclusively lead towards any one particular character, especially when the only part of the murderer we see is black rubber gloves, which we see past the halfway point. The sad fact is that we don’t see any killing occur until almost an hour into the movie, a movie that is less than 90 minutes in duration. I guess, technically, there is one murder in the first 15 minutes, but we don’t actually see it but assume the victim is killed by her scream.

The hour leading up to the murders is boring dialogue intended to build up the characters and give them some depth, but unfortunately the characters are about as deep as a puddle after a light rain. It would a totally different matter if all the blood and gore towards the end of the film was over-the-top and incredible and made the tedious wait until the action started all be worth it, but that is definitely not the case. The wait is in vain.

KILLER YACHT PARTY is not the worse low-budget, indie film to come out on the market, but it is dismally close to being thrown in that category. I think this film is one that is normally not Troma material, as it is kind of light on the sleaze, nudity, and gore- all components of a fun Troma film. I also wonder about the reasons for the film being made in 2006 and being picked up by Troma almost five years later. It seems that this film is one that could have been passed up.

Heavy amounts of gore and nudity, as well as showing all the murders and not cutting parts out with lame editing techniques that make the scenes look as though they were censored, could have been the only saving grace this film had. Instead, I just felt that KILLER YACHT PARTY was a tedious waste of nearly 90 minutes that I could have passed up on and spent my time watching another movie.

I found the commentary, conducted by director Piotr Uzarowicz and writer Alex Silver to be far more interesting and engaging than the film itself. Aside from that, there is only a trailer for the film, as well as a slew of other Troma Team releases. I dug the cover of the movie, though. I wish the cover lived up to the content of the film and had as much blood within.

KILLER YACHT PARTY fails to stay afloat as a slasher film that holds any sort of merit in the genre. My advise is to pass up this lackluster slasher film and instead, rent some of the classics from the ’80s that defined the genre.


REVIEW: Women In Prison Triple Feature

322812_aa

Mr. Skin and Panik House Entertainment presents Women In Prison, a triple feature including Chained Heat (1983), Red Heat (1985), and Jungle Warriors (1984). Two of these ’80s sleazy, exploitation flicks star Linda Blair, Sybil Danning, and John Vernon in them. One of them stars Sylvia Kristel. The following aforementioned actors and actresses already add up to cinematic guilt and pleasurable viewing that one can not imagine for me. I knew that this was going to be one of the funnest triple features that I would have the pleasure of reviewing.

I started out watching Chained Heat, a classic (in my mind) on the sub-genre that is Women in Prison flicks, which is part of the exploitation umbrella that encompasses so many other awesome sub-genres such as Naziploitation, Nunsploitation, Blaxsploitation, etc… Directed by Paul Nicholas, Chained Heat is not only one of my favorite of the Women in Prison movies, but it feels as if it is a grade above the rest in terms of sleaze, violence, action, story, and performances by some well-known names and some not-so-well-known names.

I first saw Chained Heat when I was in either Junior High or a Freshman in High School-my memory is a little hazy as to how old I was exactly, but the circumstances as to how I acquired the craptastic Video Treasures Extended Play edition on VHS were pretty clear. I stole the bad boy from a Kohl’s Department Store in the Northwest Suburbs of Chicago. There. I did it. I just admitted to a crime I committed as a young, rebellious minor while living in the suburbs of Chicago. It sounds even more suburban because Kohl’s was located in a shopping mall that is not even the same structure and layout presently.

Sybil Danning running the drug-prostitution gangs in prison

I stole the VHS copy and watched it solely on the prospect of getting a chance to see some very sexy women, such as Sybil Danning, Monique Gabriel, Sharon Hughes, Edy Williams, and Marcia Karr. Honestly, seeing Linda Blair whom I remember so fondly as a young, little girl that gets possessed by a demon and needs an exorcism in The Exorcist naked was not going to be a high-point for me in this movie. I wanted to see it because I was hoping there would be tons of nudity (including full-frontal bush), lesbian shower and prison scenes, violent rape and torture, incredibly over-the-top tough-girl dialogue and multiple prison yard fights with sadistic guards and a warden that was tough as nails and hated everyone and everything. I think that there just summed up about everything that Chained Heat had to offer.

John Vernon in hot tub as the sleazy prison warden with inmate

Chained Heat starts out with our star, Linda Blair portraying Carol Henderson, a teenager sentenced to 18 months in a women’s prison for accidentally killing a man. Once she arrives, she meets Warden Bacman. Bacman, playing a horny douchebag to a tee by John Vernon, is a super perverted, hornball that expects the beautiful women in the prison to perform sexual acts in front of him and upon him while he records them via his multiple security cameras in his office. His office just so happens to have a hot tub in it, as well as looking like something that Wickes Furniture had the pleasure of decorating. Suffice to say, the warden’s office does not look like the office of a man whom is running a prison. There is even a bed in the corner for when those female inmates need some “late-night counseling or advice” on matters.

After Henderson (Blair) gets an idea of how things are run by the warden, sternly dismissing all his sexual advances, she gets to find out how the different prison gangs run shit, which happen to be divided up by race-Blacks, led by Duchess (Tamara Dobson) on one side and the white dykes on the other side, led by Erika (Sybil Danning). I think a prison movie is not a prison movie without prison gangs and racial tension within the thick concrete walls that some refer to as hell. So far, Chained Heat was living up to ALL the expectations I had for the film.

The movie moves along at a nice pace, allowing for breaks of lesbian rape and love-making, shower scenes of women with big bush cleaning themselves and each other, and sneaky backstabbing between different factions of the prison’s administration staff, the various guards, and the two opposing gangs and those caught in the middle. The film balances well the nudity, sexuality, violence, memorable (if not at times) ultra-cheesy dialogue , and simplistic and cohesive plot and storyline. I do not want to think during this film and have their be any confusion as to why I am watching this film. I am watching this film for pure, undulating entertainment. I don’t care for a social commentary. The film ultimately tells a story of good vs. bad vs. even badder. Chained Heat is not going to win any awards for any category other than being an extremely exploitative film.If warden Bacman is not a big enough asshole and scumbag, then his assistant Captain Taylor (Stella Stevens) is even worse, but with less power. Taylor (Stevens) runs the lesbian drug-dealing rapist gang run by Erika (Danning) and is loyal to the warden only until her time comes to take his power from him. Sadly, I sympathized for the warden because he is not even the meanest character in the film.

In fact, when Chained Heat came out in the theaters the film came under fire and criticism from many critics for its overt sexism and from lesbian rights activists for portraying negative and stereotypical portrayals of lesbians as being violent and predatory. I guess lesbians and how society perceives them have come a very long way. This film was made in the mid-’80s and it was stereotypical for lesbians to be rough-necked dykes that forced themselves upon the straight pretty girls or the lipstick lesbians. I wonder if any of those women from the lesbian rights activist groups had ever been to prison and witnessed what went on in there. I mean, the women in the prison are probably not going to play nice and if they are horny, lesbians or not, they may get violent or though and force themselves upon another woman. I believe every male prison movie I have seen portrays rape and murder in prison by homosexual inmates and inmates just fucking horny and getting sexual gratification by any means necessary.

I noticed that there does exist a slightly shorter version of Chained Heat that was offered at one time in a box-set with the very same three films in this box set from Panik House, but the running time listed on the box is the unrated edition (98 min.) and not the edited version that existed for cable (88 min.), The dvd box also boasts the fact that this is the first time Chained Heat has been presented uncut in North America. There is also an interview with actress Stella Stevens (Captain Taylor) and her experience while making the film.

Moving on to Red Heat, directed by Robert Collector and Ernst R. von Theumer (I see it not only took one bad director to make this shitburger but TWO!), we have Linda Blair again as Christine Carlson, an American tourist visiting West Germany to see her fiancee who happens to be in the military and stationed there. While there, she decides to go on a walk in the middle of the night on the grounds of her hotel and witnesses some espionage spy stuff going on and is kidnapped by evil East Germans and accused of espionage and thrown in an East German prison that makes the one in Chained Heat look like the Ritz. Our evil dyke bitch in this stinker is none other than Sylvia Kristel, best known for reprising the role of Emmanuelle in the widely-recognized Euro soft-core porn flicks of the same name. Kristel portrays Sofia, the mean bitch and leader of the ugliest bunch of East German broads locked up I have ever seen. I really think that the producers used real inmates for this film because you can’t pay to find women this ugly to act in a film.

The acting, if one can call it that, in this film was far less believable and there was not much that I liked about any of the characters. Sylvia Kristel does not have a great deal of dialogue in the film, as do any of the other bad inmates that run the place with an iron fist. The inmates have these weird, ugly tattoos all over their bodies-some just on their faces and they look like they were painted on and can wash off at any moment. I really did not like Blair’s character or Kristel’s. In fact, even when Blair’s boyfriend Mike (William Ostrander) eventually gets together a group of friends and contacts to break into the prison to rescue Blair and another political inmate whom is also wrongly accused, there is no reason for me to really give two shits about what happens to any of the characters due to a total lack of character development whatsoever.

Linda Blair in an East German prison

The violence in the film could not be appreciated, what little there was. because the lighting was hardly noticeable and so many scenes were poorly lit, very dark, and grainy. At times, I felt as if I was the one in the prison and my sentence was to watch this damn movie as my punishment. The film did not offer any sort of so bad it’s good aspect to it. The film was just a solid stinker. I thought seeing Sylvia Kristel naked in the film would be a high-point but I have seen her naked so much in the Emmanuelle films which were far better in shot quality and lighting that why would I even waste my time wanting to see this film for her appearance in it.

I was glad that Red Heat did not get its own disc as Chained Heat did and that it had to share space on it with another movie. Sadly Linda Blair is the only redeeming quality in this film and that is not really saying too much. The amount of nudity is sparse, as is the fighting and violence. Only at the end do we see some significant killing, but it’s done by handguns or machine guns, leaving little to any blood or gore left around after the bodies fell. Red Heat is a bad exploitation film that is worth missing.

Jungle Warriors is an exploitation film that truly defines the term, full of gratuitous nudity, vulgarity, rape, violence, sadism, ridiculous dialogue that had me rolling in laughter at times and mouth agape at others in wonderment. Kudos to Ernst R. von Theumer and Billy Fine for creating a masterpiece of complete cheese. The film has more laugh-out loud scenes, unintentionally of course, that were backed up by performances that made the film cause me to cry in laughter rather than cry in torture. If a film is going to be bad, I would rather it be so bad that its fun to watch rather than an exercise in agonizing pain and torture.

So lets get down to the complex and very detailed plot that took three individuals: Robert Collector , Marc Furstenberg, and Ernst R. von Theumer. I believe if anymore hands were in the pot mixing the outcome would have been either more disastrous, or far more hilarious. I vote for the latter. Our story starts with a bevy of very gorgeous American models flying into South America to look for the perfect photo shoot with their agent, a photographer, and a pilot who is also acting as their guide to South America. It also just so happens that a well-known Italian mob boss whom the U. S. is trying to build a case up against is heading out to South America and arrived on the same flight into South America as our lovely young ladies. The girls head off on a small airplane chartered by their agent and head off to find some shooting locations.

Paul L. Smith portraying drug lord Cesar Santiago

The agent spots a gorgeous waterfall deep in the jungles and wants the plane to land for a photo shoot. The pilot warns the models’ agent telling him that this area is heavily infested by drug lords and that they run the country and the airplane should not be below a certain point or else it may risk the drug lords becoming aware of them. Regardless, the plane dives down to land and immediately it is under fire. The plane lands safely in the water and the girls and modeling crew make it to land to get away from the burning plane who viewers are told is going to blow up. It blows up and out girls are left in the dangerous jungles dressed in designer clothing, still clutching their over-sized purses. Shortly, the guerrilla drug lord’s army arrives looking for the plane they shot down and end up capturing the models, tying them up so that the drug lord Caesar Santiago (played by Paul L. Smith) and his wife, Angel (played by Sybil Danning) whom Santiago refers to as his sister throughout the movie can have some fun with them. In this particular scene, after Angel (Danning) decides she no longer wants to torture and play with her new toys, leaves them at the mercy of the horny, perverted, sweaty soldiers who tear their clothes off and engage in a massive rape scene. A majority of the film’s nudity occurs during this particular scene, various women’s clothing torn off revealing breasts and buttocks, as well as close-ups of the models’ faces as they cry out in pain and agony. It probably was the film’s most serious and compelling scene.

Later on, locked up in a prison cell, one of the old ladies working at the drug fortress decides to help the girls get the keys from the guard and help them escape. What happens next is an all-out war with the girls fighting the South American drug lord (portrayed by Paul L. Smith) and the Italian mob (headed by Vito Mastranga and portrayed by John Vernon), whom has arrived to work out the drug deal of the past twenty years. The film continues to turn into a Z-Grade action flick with plenty of guns blazing, poorly executed hand-to-hand combat sequences, and ridiculous lines of tough-guy dialogue administered by the big, bad guys. The girls are led into combat by Joanna Quinn (Nina Van Pallandt), suddenly handling machine guns and handguns with some pretty remarkable marksmanship and there is plenty of violence with an ever-rising body count as there seems to be an endless supply of thugs and soldiers to go and kill and get killed. I was loving every minute of it. I completely have a hard time NOT enjoying awful action-adventure flicks that have more dialogue than necessary in them, which in the case of Jungle Warriors, was any at all.

Of the three movies that comprise of the Women In Prison Triple Feature, I was most impressed by Chained Heat (again) and Jungle Warriors. Red Heat I could have done without. I was happy to read that all three films are the most complete and uncut versions out on dvd to this date. For the enjoyment these flicks brought me, the bad ones and the good ones, I think they are a good addition to anyone’s collection of exploitation and sexploitation action films, as well as great films for fans of Sybil Danning, Leslie Blair, and John Vernon. I myself, can never get enough of John Vernon and Sybil Danning’s performances in B-Grade and sometimes Z-Grade films. I guess these films held a special place in my heart, bringing back not only memories of having watched Chained Heat as a young lad, but going back to the ’80s when it seemed like films had more nudity, violence, and half-assed story lines that were still shot on film and had some well-known names from genre films.


BUSTY TWINS DOUBLE FEATURE: BUSTY TWINS/STRIP FOR ACTION (2005/2009)

The film, BUSTY TWINS a.k.a. LUST CONNECTION, focuses around the ultra rich doctor Rick Taylor (Frank Harper) whose wife, Susan (Glori-Anne Gilbert), is found dead one day in his hot tub. Of course, Rick is the prime suspect in her killing, and veteran detective Blake (Jay Richardson) starts playing hardball with Rick, sensing that something just does not add up with the facts at hand and the story that Rick has given the detective. It also does not help that Rick does not have an alibi for the day and time of the murder.

The film is basically an excuse to have soft-core sex scenes between Harper’s character and all the other hot actresses (porn stars). The film looks as if it had been a hardcore porno that was edited to secure itself from getting a XXX rating. Although it is unrated, tossing in some hardcore penetration shots would brand it a porno film. I really felt like this whole film was one giant cock tease. As for the rest of the plot, centering around Rick Taylor indulging himself in on-line sexual fantasies between other girls on their web cams, the gratuitous nudity (shots of beaver included) worked in favor of the film and its flimsy plot. My largest complaint with the whole film was the lack of bush on these sultry tarts and some of the horrendous silicone breast implants. The film is rampant with them.

There are some hilarious scenes where all these web cam encounters turn to face-to-face encounters in which the ladies want to take the fantasy to the next level and start screwing Rick in their wildest fantasy. Director H. R. Blueberry a.k.a. Jim Wynorski (Chopping Mall) directs Rick banging women in a fitness center, in the forest, in Rick’s own home with his wife downstairs-you name it and Rick is slamming a slutty babe any which way he can. Aside from multiple sex scenes with Glori-Anne Gilbert (who also plays the character Jenny, Susan’s sister), Frank Harper gets to rail Julie K. Smith (Sasha), Chasey Lain (Pizza Molly), Avy Scott (Cora), Monique Parent (Beth), Jodie Moore (The Stranger), and Holly Hollywood (girl in motel). Many of the aforementioned names you may recognize as adult film actresses.

As for the soundtrack of this film, it pretty much is the most annoying porn music I have ever heard. It is really generic techno and dance tracks, ones that would not be played in any club I would ever be caught dead in. It really reminded me of bad ‘80s flicks, ones on a next to nothing budget. I think if this movie were not a softcore sex-romp, I would have enjoyed it far more. All the actresses in the film are standard porn-issue tits, ass, and vagina, most shaved bare or with minor decorative pubic hair, and more fake tits than natural.

Most of the sex scenes are like a music video, no live sound and just the bad dance music that I hate. Sometimes it is kind of hot hearing the actor and actress moaning and groaning as their pleasures are fulfilled. As Glori-Anne Gilbert’s character changes from going blonde as Rick’s wife and back to brunette as the sister of Rick’s wife, I have to say that I really think she has a beautiful face, very sexy look to her but looks even hotter as a brunette, her natural hair color. I really don’t think this film helped monogamous married couples in any way whatsoever. Aside from the wife being murdered, Rick’s lifestyle looked to be pretty damn entertaining.

As for the 2nd “film” on the dvd, it is not really a movie as it is clips from various porn films watered down to coincide with the non-hardcore theme of the disc. Many of the scenes were taken from the exact set of the movie, with many of the same actresses and actors from Busty Twins a.k.a. Lust Connection (as this is known in the states). Out two twin sister hosts, the Potter Twins (Crystal and Jocelyn), talk us through each softcore scene while sitting naked in a soapy hot tub, with their horrible fake tits bouncing around like two beach balls, hanging over each other like incestuous lovers. Some of the tits, ass, and vagina in this segment belong to Stormy Daniels, Barbie Bennett, Friday, Taimie Hannum, Sindy Lange, Sarah Maglaughlin, Frankie Cullen, Chip N. Dale, Matt Dalpiaz, Danny Pipe, and Taylor Wayne.

The quality of the video was superb, though. Colors were rich and vibrant. The sound quality was great, too, but it was just too bad some better music was not playing during the movie. The generic techno/dance beats were killing me. They were so terrible.

As far as extras go, I guess the Strip For Action bonus feature, which is billed on this dvd as the 2nd movie on the disc, was quite a large extra if one counts it. It is almost an hour long and full of more “spank it” material. In addition to this there is a A Taste of Retro Naughty Vintage Peep Show hosted by the king of sleaze 42nd Street Pete, in which some 8mm loops are shown, only adding to about 1 ½ minutes of black and white stag-like footage. The commentary with HR Blueberry and Glori-Anne Gilbert is pretty cool. Glori-Anne has such a sexy voice and it has got to be funny to talk about yourself in scenes in which one is stripping, screwing, and getting licked up and down by your co-stars. It is pretty cool to hear a director and his lead actress talking about a soft-core porn film. I wish hardcore porn films had audio commentaries during them. I think it would be hysterical.

I think if you want to be teased with nudity, “almost” hardcore sex, and simulated love scenes-than this is your film. I say go out and rent some real hardcore sex films instead of a watered down flick with a boring plot, lifeless acting, and pretty boring overall. The only reason I did not give this film a lower rating is I like hot women, nudity, and cheesy flicks. One could probably pass this one up and find a flick with the same amount of nudity but maybe a dash of action, gore, humor, or a higher caliber of actors and actresses.